Hey Bored,
Yes, if it were up to him, this sad relationship that the two of U are in would continue on the same path forever, but, the relationship with the other chick that he might be involved with is probably spicy as hell. If you don’t work to turn things around, he will surely stray or may already be kickin’ it with someone else. Yes! I said it! I'm not saying that he is definitely cheating, but the possibility exists. He is staying out late and not responding to your calls. He may appear to be content with the relationship, but, HE IS NOT. No one is content with a boring, sexless marriage. His apparent contentment may be because he may have some young stuff on the side that's providing him with the lovin’ and encouragement that he is not getting at home. Don’t let the calm, cool exterior fool you. Since U are writing me, I am going to tell U how to begin to repair the relationship. You seem to love him and he seems to be a pretty good guy, besides having such flaws as being lazy in some departments and oblivious to the marital problems. The reason he behaves the way he does is that he has no motivation to do any better. Girl, give him some motivation. Take them chillins’ over to their grandmother’s house or to the babysitter on Friday night. Go to a really naughty website and order you something very sexy … a lacy negligee with a garter belt and black thigh high boots. Make sure you buy a whip so that you can wop that a ..... :) Call him at the office at noon and tell him that you have a surprise planned for him (if he’s not cheating, he will be there) …… call him again at about 2pm and tell him that he is “Oh so sexy”…… and call him one last time at around 4pm to tell him that you are laying on the bed thinking of him … he will be shocked and probably wondering what is really going on. Tell him not to come home until 8pm. You then drink a Red Bull laced with a little alcohol. Light some candles. Take a warm bubble bath and sexy yourself up. Polish your nails and toes and scrub those rough heels so that they won’t scratch the brotha … look at yourself in the mirror, whip in hand … thigh high boots … and say to yourself that you are one fine, sexy diva … …..now … back to life ….and back to reality … I know that you are shakin' your head right now and saying that you don’t like him that much right now to go through all of that trouble … and besides, what has he done for you lately … besides pay all the dang bills? Sistagirl, just take the kids somewhere for the evening, drink a Red Bull with a stiff shot of vodka and have relations with your man. It won’t hurt to bubble bath it up and put on that sexy nightie that you haven’t worn in years. Men are not complicated, they just need some lovin’ from time to time and a few words of encouragement.

After the two of you have sexed it up and he has gotten a few winks, tell him, in a nice way, that you need some help and if he does more, that you promise to provide him with a little more excitement … come on …at least one to two times a week. He may laugh and think that you are crazy, but it may just work. You have to give a little to get a little. If you love him, you have to find the energy to give the brotha some lovin’ here and there and it won’t hurt to add a few words of thanks for the things that he is doing right.

Sistagirl, remember, U wrote me and not him …. U want to know how to save the marriage …. U want to know what U need to do, so don’t be rollin’ your neck saying “Why do I have to do everything? “ Bored, just try the sexy tactic and if that or nothing else works, i.e … counseling with a therapist or your pastor, a temporary separation, crying, screaming and yelling, or just plain excepting him for who he is ……  and you are on the verge of having a nervous breakdown, say freak it and move on. Girlfriend … U will be just fine. You’re making good money and you are doing almost everything on your own any dang way!